A Letter of Introduction

My dreams were originally to become a musician, or songwriter that played their own works, when I was young and had much to learn about the world. I believe that you should always have dreams, big dreams, in order to accomplish big things. It is important because it gives you a direction and without direction you don't get where you truly want to go. However, it requires you know what you want and to know who you are deep down. To know what your real bucket list is as if this were really the moments that had to count. That is why having a finite lifespan is part of God's plan. That is why I needed to learn what I really wanted through experiencing my own life independently, and to learn that the only one holding me back from choosing what things I wanted to do with it was myself, in my insecurities, in my fears.

I grew in faith in levels. I first considered myself to be a writer (or poet, actually, though now I prefer the term writer) when I experienced that song lyrics were the most important part of the song in a class Rock Lyrics as a Literature Form at San Joaquin Delta College. That class was where I learned the emotions I was craving to convey (at the time it was for self-centered reasons in which I had my own definition of how relationships were meant to be)… I learned that those emotions were just as powerful without the tones and sound effects, when paired with the intonation of a poetic voice.

I am telling you this background to establish what led me to writing, then to publishing/editing, then back to writing. From having that background that was to promote the passionate writing I had, I learned the ins and outs of how things worked in the publishing world and got numerous credits and experiences but none of which were of a league to count in being able to get an agent to connect with a big publisher in non-fiction. Non-fiction, I know this by the time I began writing in it, is a field in which success is measured by having an audience already to support it, such is the amount of scrutiny one's personal experiences such as mine would be under when without a large amount of research to back it up (or degrees and/or public fan following).

Having established the rule, I propose my rationalization for breaking it. 

By my personal experiences, I have lived through several suicide attempts and a period of chaos in which I had no direction and in which I had put my hopes upon worldly things and not in the love of God nor the love of others. I learned that lesson the hard way, and learned its solution when placing my life in God's hands with a prayer and giving to God in faith, and never looking back in the means by which I would lead my life. My life has been with a purpose. To live with passion, is the best that one can aspire to, regardless of formal education, regardless of research supporting the findings, and regardless of social status. My life counts, as everyone else's does, in immeasurable amounts.

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