In my earlier, pre-evolved state of mind, I hadn't known how to respond when people told me to "just be yourself."
I thought that I had to be perfect in what I said, and because of that insecurity, I ended up saying very little.
I started writing down what I wanted to say and writing more things down by far than I actually said.
I didn't have the courage to be imperfect, and as a result, had no communication.
Communication is necessary in relationships, even before they have grown into relationships.
I learned when I actually started my first relationship, that my first one didn't read my mind, which in foresight is obvious.
I had for some reason assumed, in my limited experiences of communication, that everyone had pretty much the same thoughts.
That was very far from the truth, I learned after, because people are unique in not only personality, but also background.
I eventually met the one I was destined to be with at a poetry open mic, and had already had my first heartbreak to mature somewhat from.
The impression I made was good, and it was because I had been waiting for that opportunity to impress and had poetry written which showed my emotional strength of passion, which I hadn't found the right person for until that day.
Ever since then I have grown more and more, living in the life with that person now my wife, most of my life.
We still have issues with communication, but less and less so. It is the little things which get blown out of proportion that life deals us, that we have to show our strength in, in order to enjoy life in any circumstance.
For example, say several things that "should have" gone another direction in your daily life went very different than you thought could go, for the worse, as if the world were conspiring to attack you. It's just the normal reaction, flawed, which gets irritated or upset, but if you turn it around and flip the situation as I now try to do as soon as I see it as such, then you thank God for the palanca, for the challenge, for the opportunity to grow and serve up suffering on behalf of God and others, it is then that I achieve peace of mind so perfect that nothing short of direct pain can upset my lovely day.
It is that lesson I learned by doing it other ways, but others can learn if they hear stories like this from others.
Just talk things over, do not let little things get out of proportion, and love one another... pass it on.
Donald R. Anderson. Aspiring writer. Amateur philosopher and amateur writer of Apologetics (i.e., the Catholic reasonings). Faith-driven kindred spirit.